Michael B. Duff

Lubbock's answer to a question no one asked

Archive for the ‘Facebook’ Category

Facebook offers faster ways to ruin your marriage

This Facebook widget crap has gotten out of hand. It caters to the lowest instincts of the Internet user — the doodad-collecting, quiz-taking, LOLCAT-worshipping masses.

And now they've found a new way to ruin your marriage.

I just got a news flash across my Facebook feed:

“This HOT OR NOT user wants to meet Greg Wharton!” This appears beside a microscopic picture of a girl who appears to be posing in tight shorts.

Which I read as, “Greg Wharton is about to cheat on his wife with THIS WOMAN! Sign up, and see if she has a sister!”

There is an alternate possibility. The girl in the picture may actually be Greg's wife, in which case they're just bragging.

Either way, this is more information than I needed.

Do they already have a status dropdown for this?

Michael is cheating on: his wife/a test/his taxes.

There has been an invasion of corporate execs on Facebook lately. Executives from our parent company have popped up with these cute, sanitized “my boss made me join Facebook” profiles and started adding rank and file employees from the A-J.

There's nothing quite like the cold chill you get when you find out a corporate VP has added you to his Friends list.

Like getting a LiveJournal comment from your dad.

I can already see the emails. “Hey Duff, I saw those pictures on your Facebook. I didn't know they made leather pants in your size, ha ha! Can we blow that up for the Christmas party slideshow?”

Facebook must be stopped.

UPDATE: And if all that's not bad enough, now Facebook is ruining Christmas.

Written by Michael B. Duff

November 21, 2007 at 12:08

Posted in Facebook